Updated: Oct 27, 2019
Maybe you’re in a situation you never imagined you’d be in. Maybe you’re not the person you thought you’d be at the age of 25 or 30. Maybe you are yet to find love. Maybe your goals and plans are not working the way you want them to. And, you feel frustrated. And, hurt.
I am no different from you. At 29 years old, I am diagnosed with Synovial Sarcoma (initially diagnosed and treated for Leiomyosarcoma). Not the best condition at any point in someone’s life and certainly not for a young adult who just started building a life. But, would you believe me if I tell you that I’ve found more meaning in my life today? I won’t deny that at times, I still get sad - just because I miss some loved ones and friends, work, and other stuff I used to do that I am not allowed to for now.
Let me paint you a bigger picture of my situation right now: After 5 cycles of chemotherapy, a wide excision in my calf and 7 out of 30 planned sessions of radiation therapy, I underwent a chest CT scan last August with the thought that I could finally get back to work this October after I finish all the scheduled sessions of radiotherapy. I was so positive that I was getting better and that recovery was underway. I already grew my hair a few inches and lost the pounds I gained from the treatment. Just when I thought the worst is over, the result of my chest CT scan told me otherwise. I was so excited to have the result we were praying for - full healing, only to find out there was an interval increase in number and size of the lung lesions. The lumps in my lungs increased. Here I am now, completing another round of chemo (maximum of 6 cycles) - my season of waiting is yet again stretched.
I kept asking myself, “The answer to our prayer is 'Not now 'and not 'No', right?”
It felt like I was almost at the finish line - but the Lord decided to add another lap. I remember crying my heart out because I didn’t understand what it is that the Lord wanted.
Then it hit me - I was reminded of the story of the Ten Plagues in the book of Exodus. Why did they have to be ten, and not just one or five? Why did the Lord keep hardening the Pharaoh’s heart? It is because only then will the magnitude of the Lord’s power be remembered for all generations, throughout the entire world. It’s all about His timing. No matter what circumstance we are in, He can dramatically change it for His highest glory.
Some of the greatest figures in the Bible - Abraham, Joseph and Moses- had to wait for many years for God’s promises. Everything that happened during the ‘waiting period’ was used to prepare them. Then, when they reached their promise, they were blessed beyond measure. Just like them, I choose to wait and be strengthened as a mighty warrior fit for service in His kingdom.
God invites us to trust in His goodness today and His faithfulness tomorrow. Surrendering control to him is the only way to experience His love and peace.
God is telling us today that He is faithful in every situation. He gives us exactly what we need at the right time. Wait on Him and turn your test into a testimony!